One of the hardest things to learn when you're building anything is figuring out whose opinion actually deserves space in your head.

Because everybody has one.

Your friends.

Your family.

Your customers.

Your partners.

Some random person who discovered you 14 minutes ago.

And if you listen to every single person, you'll eventually have 50 people pulling you in 50 different directions.

But here's the other side:

If you never listen to anybody because you think you know everything?

You're probably an idiot too. 😂

There's a balance.

Sometimes you need to genuinely shut up, put your ego aside, and listen.

Other times?

You need to mentally tell somebody:

Please shut the hell up.

First: Can This Person Actually Teach Me Something?

This is probably my biggest filter.

If somebody has experience I don't have, has accomplished something I'm trying to accomplish, understands a market better than me, or simply sees a blind spot I missed?

I'm listening.

And I mean actually listening.

Not sitting there waiting for my turn to explain why they're wrong.

I've had people smarter than me tell me something I didn't necessarily want to hear, and after thinking about it I realized:

Damn. They're right.

That's called being coachable.

Your ego can't be so big that nobody can tell you shit.

But What's Your Source? 😂

Then there's the other kind of advice.

Somebody who has never built what you're building.

Never worked in the industry.

Never talked to your customers.

Never seen your numbers.

Never taken the risk.

Never done the research.

But somehow they're EXTREMELY confident about what you need to do.

That's when I'm thinking:

Based on fucking what? 😂

Having an opinion doesn't automatically make your opinion valuable.

Sometimes people aren't giving you insight.

They're giving you their fears.

Their limitations.

Their assumptions.

Or simply what they would've done.

And that's fine.

But I don't automatically have to apply it to my life.

Pay Attention When Multiple Good Sources Say the Same Thing

This is another one I've learned.

One person's opinion?

Interesting.

But if three or four people I genuinely respect independently point out the same problem?

Now I'm paying attention.

At some point you have to consider:

Maybe they're seeing something I'm not.

That's where being self-aware matters.

You can't call every piece of criticism “hate” just because it makes you uncomfortable.

Sometimes criticism is free consulting.

Use it.

Know the Difference Between Feedback and Projection

There's also a huge difference between:

“I think this could be better because…”

and:

“I would never do that.”

Okay?

Then don't. 😂

Something being wrong for you doesn't automatically make it wrong for me.

People project their personalities, risk tolerance, finances, experiences, and fears onto other people constantly.

That's why you have to understand where advice is coming from before you internalize it.

Results Get a Louder Voice

This might sound harsh, but I naturally give more weight to opinions backed by experience.

If I'm learning basketball, I probably want to hear from somebody who can actually hoop.

If I'm building a company, I'm going to pay attention when somebody who's successfully built companies tells me something.

If I'm designing something, I'm interested in what talented designers notice.

That doesn't mean somebody needs to be a millionaire before they can have a good idea.

Great ideas can come from anywhere.

But when somebody starts confidently telling me exactly how I should move?

Your track record becomes relevant.

And Sometimes You Really Do Need to Shut the Hell Up

This applies to me too.

Sometimes somebody knows more than you.

Let them talk.

Ask questions.

Take notes.

Remove your ego.

You don't always need to prove you're the smartest person in the room.

I've always believed having people around me who are better than me at certain things makes me better.

That's what a good team is supposed to do.

But once I've listened, researched, considered the source, looked at the information, and made my decision?

I'm comfortable moving.

At that point, everybody doesn't get unlimited opportunities to debate my choices with me.

The Goal Isn't to Ignore People

The goal is developing a filter.

Hear people out.

Be coachable.

Respect experience.

Look for patterns.

Listen when people you trust challenge you.

Be willing to admit when you're wrong.

But also understand that everybody with an opinion isn't automatically qualified to redirect your life.

Sometimes somebody tells you something and you need to think:

I needed to hear that.

And sometimes somebody tells you something and you need to think:

Man, shut the hell up. 😂

Wisdom is learning the difference.